Updated: Jul 5, 2021
Ginger "Gingy" Breadman has sued DreamWorks Animation for emotional and physical damages, after he revealed that his legs were actually (cookie) cut off, during the famed Lord Farquaad torture scene.
"I have felt crummy for too fucking long, man. I'm a tough cookie, but just imagine your legs being stripped in the name of cinema? DreamWorks has to be held accountable. They have pushed my buttons for the last time," said Gingy said very angrily.
Just in time for Shrek 2, Dreamworks was able to hook Gingy up with two prosthetic legs. Gingy temporarily breathed a sigh of relief. However, Gingy went out on a limb and realized the legs were not made of gingerbread, but of off-brand oatmeal.
"What I can't stand more than getting my legs amputated is a liar. They couldn't even give me gingerbread legs," Gingy said disgustedly.
Gingy was offered a beacon of hope, when he was offered a tryout in "Far Far Away Idol".
The grand prize? Two freshly-baked gingerbread legs.
"I practiced for months. I sang "Sugar Sugar" over and over. I found the love of my life and duet partner, Tinkerbell, in the process. I was dough-eyes over her. However, I later learned that she was in cahoots with Captain Hook. She threw the competition," Gingy said (half) baked, as he was watching his favorite movie, Little Man Tate.
When asked, what he did with the gingerbread legs, and if he would donate them to Gingy, Captain Hook had other plans.
"Yeah, could I have given Gingy the gingerbread legs? Absolutely. Did I? Absolutely not. Instead I have made them into a necklace. That's the way the fucking cookie crumbles," Captain Hook said as he pointed to his gingerbread leg necklace.
Other celebrities including famed comedian, Leggard Leggenson, have gone to extreme heights to get a leg up on their careers.
"I can empathize with Gingy. I know that I voluntarily broke my leg, and it healed. But, I still think that him and I are bonded forever" Leggenson said (fully) baked.
Gingy is currently suing DreamWorks for one million dollars in punitive damages, four gingerbread legs, as well as having his own movie.
Rainked.com did not reach out to DreamWorks for comment.